God, Wife, and Struggles

In August 2018, I was diagnosed with PCOS, polycystic ovarian syndrome. Which to I replied with, “What in the world is that and how do we fix it?” To makes things simple let’s start with what PCOS is.

PCOS is a common hormonal disorder with causes ovaries to swell up and grow cysts. This for some woman isn’t the issue. We can deal with cysts, as long as they don’t burst. It’s the symptoms that just really get to us. PCOS causes the following:

• irregular mensrual cycles
• exess hair growth
• acne
• obesity
• infertility
• depression
• High testostome
• loss of hair
• fatigue
• pelvic pain
• mood changes
• headaches
• sleeping problems
• insuline imbalance
• and more…

Take a minute to just take that list in. 1 in every 10 women get PCOS. There is no cure. There is not miracle drug. Most women, after being diagnosed, are told that their chances of getting pregnant are low to none and are automatically placed on a medication call metformine. Metformine is commonly used for diabetics.

Since I was 15 years old, I knew something was wrong with me. I didn’t really have regular periods and I couldn’t loose weight. At the time, I didn’t think much about it. When I got married, we decided that I was having too many side effects to the birth control I was taking. I talked with J and we determined that I didn’t need to take any. I went over a year without using birth control and not getting pregnant. I thought maybe I was just not having luck and kept missing ovulation. But at this point, I was going one or two months without a period. It’s already difficult for women to know exactly when they are ovulating, now imagine not know at all when that could happen.

I finally decided I needed to speak to a professional. I went to a women’s clinic where I talked to a doctor about what was happening. That’s when I was diagnosed. I was told that I needed to get on metformine, and that she didn’t want to say I was infertile but that I practically was. That’s never something you want to hear.

As soon as I got diagnosed, I went on the internet to research more. I found out that a lot of what I had been suffering with was a part of PCOS. There came a time where I was sleeping 8+ hours a day and I was still exhausted. I would get head aches that were just horrible and just craved sugar so much. When my periods would come they would be so painful and long. My longest period was over two weeks, every day was a heavy day.

It took me about three months to get over the first shock. During that time we are 92% sure that I had a miscarriage while we were on vacation. By the time we got home, 40 hours later, we went to the ER and they said they didn’t know what was going on. This made things so much more difficult for me. My faith was not at its best during this time.

PCOS had cause me to be doubtful but in the mist of that family and friends reminded me of His goodness. Slowly, I began to give all of my struggles of PCOS to the Lord. I can confidently say that my PCOS is not standing in the way of my relationship with Christ. I know that even in the pain that PCOS may cause I will trust that the Lord has it all in HIs hands.

Shortly after I was diagnosed, I was contacted by a comunity of ladies who all had PCOS. They were welcoming and informative. They let me know what works for them and what didn’t. I quickly realized that Metformine, didn’t work for me. It took some time but I was able to learn how to track my periods and figure out when I was ovulating.

Every woman has her own story when it comes to PCOS. There are also different levels of it, so some have it much worse than I. But the most important thing that I’ve found is that with a strong support group you can manage it.